An encounter with God

Miffed by the fact that nothing was going right in my life inspite of being very humble and religious and ritualistic, I decided to settle this dispute with the Almighty himself. I am not a very big fan of female gods right from my childhood, reasons unknown.. Somehow the only god which is close to my heart since I began to understand things is Ganpati bappa (the elephant god). So, on my way home, there is a temple of Ganpati bappa where I decided to go and talk my heart out to him.

Ganpati bappa: There you are! Long time no see, where have you been all these days?

Me (was quite irritated as I had a bad day at work): I am here only, where else can I go to escape from the life which you have gifted me?

Ganpati bappa: Why, what is wrong with the life you are leading now?

Me: You are asking me this? You know everything well. My work sucks, I have no recognition there no matter how much I contribute, I have to work on week ends many a times. People who joined after me are going places and I am still stuck at the same level and role. My personal life is not great either. I am irritated most of the time at home, I keep complaining the whole time. I can't sleep well at night, have lost my appetite, my thyroid levels are high..

Ganpati bappa: Oh stop complaining now, will you? The problems you are facing are invited by you only my dear, let me explain..

@ Work - Why can't you be happy working as an individual contributor? You can work in flexible hours and you have no tension of any manager watching over you. You have time for yourself and your hobbies when you are not working, which many others do not even have. Why do you always have to compare yourself with the people who have moved ahead and not with those who do not have a job yet inspite of having a sound education?

@ Home - You have such a nice and understanding husband, who never even talks about not having a child yet. He knows that it will surely happen on day when the right time comes. Why don't you accept that you will become a mother only when you are ready for it mentally and physically? You have to wait for some more time and have a firm belief that it will surely happen!

Think of people who are not as privileged as you are or as blessed as you are! Just give it a thought and you will realize that you are not in such a bad shape as you think you are!

I was dumbfounded. How did Bappa know all this? Oh, who else can know better than him? He is the Almighty, isn't he?

Me: I did not realize the other side of my so-called difficulties. I was so engrossed in myself that I forgot that there are people in this world who do not even have basic things in life such as food, clothing and shelter. But bappa, why do you make people suffer this way if they all are your children?

Bappa: I test their patience and their strong will. They realize their own potential and capability and come up with solutions to their own problems, when they are confronted with adversities. When they sit back and contemplate on it, they realize that things can be worked out instead of fretting and fuming over things.

Me: Do you ever go and see them or help them in case they need you?

Bappa: Oh yes, I do. I have visited you too many a times to see if you are alright.

Me (very surprised): Really? When was that? And how come I did not recognize you?

Bappa (grinning from ear to ear): I actually come in different shapes and sizes. You know I can change forms, don't you?

I visited you in form of that hungry kitten whom you fed and reared back to life, when it was helpless and small.

I met you in that pregnant woman whom you offered your seat in the train the other day.

I met you in that young man who was shabbily dressed, but who helped you to get change of Rs. 500/- when you had nothing else to buy a ticket. You were in a spot that day and that man came from nowhere and gave you the change, remember?

Yes, all these incidents flashed before my eyes and suddenly I became quiet and my anger and irritation vanished. I was suddenly content with myself and I was smiling to myself. Bappa was smiling too.

Bappa: I am with you, beta. All the time, with you, within you. Why do you have to search me outside you in temples or other similar places? I am your inner voice and I am your conscience which guides you when you are confused and when you need to take a decision. All you have to do is sit back, close your eyes, think of me and I am there. So my advise to you is make good friends, meet good people, always do good deeds, help others, be good to people even if they are bad to you. Be content with whatever you have, because that is the the best which I have chosen for you.

Me: I understand that but then shouldn't one be ambitious?

Bappa: Oh yes, absolutely, but not at the cost of your inner peace and your family life. Earning money is good which gives you the basic things for survival and also the comforts which you always dreamed of. But running after it forgetting everything around you takes you nowhere and makes you lonely at the end of life's journey.

Me: Yes, I understand now the importance of being peaceful and content from within and that I need not search for it outside me or in an external form or in people who are not able to fulfill my expectations. I should just do my duties without any expectations so that I do not get dejected at all and if expectations are fulfilled, it is a bonus!

Bappa: Yes, you get the whole point now. I see now that you are mellowed down and not angry on me or the circumstances in your life. Everybody in this world has a definite role to play and you have yours too! So go my child, be the hero, I mean heroine of your own life and do your best and leave to me the rest..

Bappa winks at me!

Me:  Yes, my namaskar (greetings) to you and thank you very much for acquainting me with my inner self where you always reside.

I came out with a new self and a radiant smile and content in my heart. From that day onwards, I do not crib about anything in my life and take every day as a 'present' from the bappa!

Do you think you should also need to talk to the Almighty some day?

P.S: The dialog could have been written in Marathi, my mother-tongue, but then to cater to a multiplicity of audience, I chose to write it in English. Bappa talking in English may seem a bit odd, but then it is the dialog with one's inner self which can be in any language, isn't it?