Aspirations

Though my son is just 8 months old, I often think of what he will chose as a profession and how different will that be from the usual routine? As a baby, he cycled a lot when he was still lying on his back. That time, I jokingly said, will you be a cyclist and break all the existing records of the world championships? Then as he started sitting, he now has picked the habit of banging his hands on every thing that comes in his way, be it a plate or a toy or a table. He bangs things with the specific position of fingers and wrist, just like a tabla player. Then a thought comes to my mind, will he be the next Zakir Hussain? He crawls all around the house now, but his favorite destination is kitchen. He wants to see what his grand mother or the cook is cooking. He has to see if the washing machine is running properly and if the kitchen floor is mopped properly or if something has been dropped on the floor. His sharp eyes will see such tiny objects which my eyes with spectacles can’t see. Then my mind starts running again and I think, will be a celebrity chef like Sanjeev Kapoor? I know all these thoughts are not really going to take shape. He is going to do what he will like the most and most important thing is that he should enjoy what he will do.

We both as parents are not going to force him to do what we aspired to do, but couldn’t become due to various circumstances. Our parents gave us the freedom to choose what we wanted to do and that made us responsible and accountable to all the decisions which we took with regards to career. Though I was academically bright, I was never asked to follow the usual path of engineering or doctor. I made a choice, a conscious effort to learn a foreign language and I am enjoying what I am doing currently. I am amongst those fortunate ones who are practicing what they have really taken pains and interest to learn. I know many people who did education in stream A, but are forced to work in entirely different field. They neither have the interest to acquire knowledge in stream B and move ahead successfully, nor have the guts to go back to what they really like.

When I was carrying, I had attended a workshop on “Garbhasanskar” (educating the fetus in the womb) and there I was told a wonderful thing. “The baby who is going to come into your life and family is going to be an individual, who is going to take birth to satisfy his needs and aspirations and not yours”. What a thought! We have a tradition where son/daughter carries on with the responsibility of fulfilling the wishes of their parents, even though they do not really like that field. Sons of doctors do become doctors and a businessman’s daughter has to take over the business, though she wants to do something on her own. The trend is changing a lot now. There are exceptions and parents have also become conscious now. Forcing your child to do something which you couldn’t do may drive the kid to depression and even suicide. I know a family where the parents put their son in the engineering stream even when he was average in school and just managed to get a bare minimum of 60 % in the 12^th standard. He himself was not clear as to what he really liked and what he wanted to do ahead in his life. So he carried on with the family’s tradition without thinking twice. He flunked all the subjects in both the semesters in 1^st year and had to sit at home for the next year to just clear the 1^st year subjects. He does not understand the subjects or what is taught in the college and does not know if he will be able to clear the subjects and move ahead in the Engineering stream. Only if his parents would have consulted a career consultant earlier or would have got his aptitude tests done, he would have been a much happier and successful boy today and would have enjoyed doing and learning what really interested him.

Today there are many avenues open to the young generation. There are educational courses now, which were unheard of when I graduated in the year 2000. Today’s generation is smarter and knows what they want to pursue. They do all the background checks and keep their preferences and choices ready and when they get an opportunity, they make the most of it and excel in it. My kid sister, Aradhana, knew very well that she doesn’t want to do Engineering or Medicine or MBA, because most of the kids still do that. She chose to do a B.Sc and also studied a foreign language side by side. She is also clearly focused on what she is going to do after her graduation. I feel really proud to see her parents support her in every thing. She is happy and so are her parents in turn.

Whatever career our kids choose, we should support them as long as it makes them happy and self-sufficient and the least we can expect from them is that they put in their best efforts and pursue their dreams with passion and a good spirit.