As I mentioned in my earlier post about Atul's absence and Tanay's illness and the impending and boring atmosphere during the biggest festival of Europe, I was actually saved by my loved ones and how? Definitely with the help of technology to a great extent. Usually, I am of the opinion that the technology has enslaved the mankind, but in these 3 weeks, I was connected with my family and close friends through mobile phone, who gave me mental strength to be alone here, in this cold and hostile environment.
My colleagues, Mrunal, Shweta, Gauri made it a point to check on me daily, either by their presence or through whtapps. They stayed with me in the first week and helped me to sail smoothly through the first week. But in the later weeks, they all had already made plans for trips and hence they couldn't be there thereafter. My sister-in-law's brother and his wife, Jignesh and Rita stayed with me the longest and supported and helped me through the major tough times of Tanay's illness. I can't really thank them enough. They both soon became favorites of Tanay and he mixed with them quite well. They both pampered him and entertained him a lot. We all had a nice break with each other, there were things to share and talk and also take care of the little one. We saw movies, went out shopping, talked about the differences between Maharashtra, Gujrat, Karnataka, Delhi and Germany. In this place, we all shared a common bond, being Indian, being able to speak and understand Marathi. Rita cooked dishes for us and we shared a great rapport. I will definitely cherish this time with them and look forward to merry times again, minus the illness phase, of course!!!
My new friend, Arpita from the Marathi Muli in Stuttgart group on FB, was in touch with me constantly through mobile. She guided me to deal with Tanay's newly surfaced tantrums and gave me tips to deal with him in a quiet and peaceful manner. His illness, crankiness were taking a toll on my mental balance and I was somewhere losing it, but thanks to her, I learnt that kids go through this phase and it will soon wear out. My best friends, Sonali and Snehal from Bangalore were in touch with me asking me about the developments in Tanay's health. I felt so blessed to have these friends around. Though not physically, I was always there in their thoughts and prayers. They treat Tanay as their own son and they were worried about me being alone here managing everything. I would also like to mention a few other friends here who helped me with their kind words. Thanks Ralf, Deepu, Sharvari.
My mom, dad, both the grandmothers met me almost daily on Skype and tried to cheer me up. They tried boosting my morale with their kind words and acts, but I am sure, the circumstances here must have made them worry about me and Tanay. They didn't obviously show it on their faces, they wanted me to be strong and not lose patience, but I am sure, mom and dad would have sat their listless and prayed for us. Parents and parents, aren't they.. I wish I become a good parent like them for my little fella too!
I often thought to myself. Why was I feeling so lonely and helpless here? Germany has the best of the best technology, infrastructure. Things are quite simple and easy here, there is nothing to fight for here! Everything is taken care of, right from water, electricity, internet to means of transport and food. Then, why was I struggling mentally daily in and out without Atul? If Atul was here, I would have definitely not felt the pinch, but I realized that without him here, everything seemed so bleak and hopeless. Oh my, was I missing him amidst all the friends and the so-called 'freedom' which he claimed I would enjoy, when he would be away? Yes, I suppose, as I was not enjoying a bit of the freedom. Maybe I am a too emotional and dependent person and I need him to feel affirmative about things and circumstances in this foreign country. Am I wrong in feeling something like this? The feminists may not agree and even Atul may mock at me for being such a weak woman, but then that was what I genuinely faced and felt in these 3 weeks. I have stayed away from him quite a few times, but that was in India and with all my family and friends around. I did not feel so lonely and helpless then as I felt now in these 3 weeks in a country, where I could actually understand and speak the language. I realized that nothing and no one can substitute my dear husband's presence and the presence of loved ones, dear friends and family in my life. I am people person and I shall always be. I shouldn't be ashamed of myself when I say I need people to survive. I can't find bliss and peace in self and in being alone.
I have already warned Atul that he can't leave me and Tanay like this and go away on a personal holiday, no matter what he thinks and feels, we will follow him, wherever he goes, except on business trips, of course!!!
The saving grace has been and shall always be people and their Love for me!!!!
Would you agree?
My colleagues, Mrunal, Shweta, Gauri made it a point to check on me daily, either by their presence or through whtapps. They stayed with me in the first week and helped me to sail smoothly through the first week. But in the later weeks, they all had already made plans for trips and hence they couldn't be there thereafter. My sister-in-law's brother and his wife, Jignesh and Rita stayed with me the longest and supported and helped me through the major tough times of Tanay's illness. I can't really thank them enough. They both soon became favorites of Tanay and he mixed with them quite well. They both pampered him and entertained him a lot. We all had a nice break with each other, there were things to share and talk and also take care of the little one. We saw movies, went out shopping, talked about the differences between Maharashtra, Gujrat, Karnataka, Delhi and Germany. In this place, we all shared a common bond, being Indian, being able to speak and understand Marathi. Rita cooked dishes for us and we shared a great rapport. I will definitely cherish this time with them and look forward to merry times again, minus the illness phase, of course!!!
My new friend, Arpita from the Marathi Muli in Stuttgart group on FB, was in touch with me constantly through mobile. She guided me to deal with Tanay's newly surfaced tantrums and gave me tips to deal with him in a quiet and peaceful manner. His illness, crankiness were taking a toll on my mental balance and I was somewhere losing it, but thanks to her, I learnt that kids go through this phase and it will soon wear out. My best friends, Sonali and Snehal from Bangalore were in touch with me asking me about the developments in Tanay's health. I felt so blessed to have these friends around. Though not physically, I was always there in their thoughts and prayers. They treat Tanay as their own son and they were worried about me being alone here managing everything. I would also like to mention a few other friends here who helped me with their kind words. Thanks Ralf, Deepu, Sharvari.
My mom, dad, both the grandmothers met me almost daily on Skype and tried to cheer me up. They tried boosting my morale with their kind words and acts, but I am sure, the circumstances here must have made them worry about me and Tanay. They didn't obviously show it on their faces, they wanted me to be strong and not lose patience, but I am sure, mom and dad would have sat their listless and prayed for us. Parents and parents, aren't they.. I wish I become a good parent like them for my little fella too!
I often thought to myself. Why was I feeling so lonely and helpless here? Germany has the best of the best technology, infrastructure. Things are quite simple and easy here, there is nothing to fight for here! Everything is taken care of, right from water, electricity, internet to means of transport and food. Then, why was I struggling mentally daily in and out without Atul? If Atul was here, I would have definitely not felt the pinch, but I realized that without him here, everything seemed so bleak and hopeless. Oh my, was I missing him amidst all the friends and the so-called 'freedom' which he claimed I would enjoy, when he would be away? Yes, I suppose, as I was not enjoying a bit of the freedom. Maybe I am a too emotional and dependent person and I need him to feel affirmative about things and circumstances in this foreign country. Am I wrong in feeling something like this? The feminists may not agree and even Atul may mock at me for being such a weak woman, but then that was what I genuinely faced and felt in these 3 weeks. I have stayed away from him quite a few times, but that was in India and with all my family and friends around. I did not feel so lonely and helpless then as I felt now in these 3 weeks in a country, where I could actually understand and speak the language. I realized that nothing and no one can substitute my dear husband's presence and the presence of loved ones, dear friends and family in my life. I am people person and I shall always be. I shouldn't be ashamed of myself when I say I need people to survive. I can't find bliss and peace in self and in being alone.
I have already warned Atul that he can't leave me and Tanay like this and go away on a personal holiday, no matter what he thinks and feels, we will follow him, wherever he goes, except on business trips, of course!!!
The saving grace has been and shall always be people and their Love for me!!!!
Would you agree?
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