Read the first part here:
My black beauty (Part 1)
On the evening of January 13, 2023, we brought the black beauty to our home. My kind German neighbor, Gila, gave me her parking space because her car was with her son-in-law and that spot was empty. She had given the spot to different people who wanted an extra one without any extra costs. When she got to know that I got my driving license in October last year, she immediately told me, "Lini, whenever you get a car for yourself, I shall let you park on my parking spot." And she stood by it. The day before we were getting the car, she asked the other person to take her car out of the spot. After we brought the car home, I did puja on the car. I welcomed her into our lives and thanked her for being the first car ever in Germany.
The next thing I did was order a learner's board and stick it near the number plate. I had asked my Brazilian friend about it, and she told me that it is easily available on Amazon. It's not exactly an L like in India, but it's close. It says on a small sticky board that I am a beginner, and there's also an appeal to other drivers to be gracious and understanding. I thought it was important for my confidence, and that would make other drivers around me less hasty and more considerate.
On Sunday, 15.01.2023, we as a family went for a small drive together. I was, of course, in the driver's seat. And my husband was sitting next to me. That was somewhere he has never been in the 10 to 12 years that he has been driving. He was always used to driving, so it was a sort of discomfort or challenge for me to sit next to him. He was afraid that I was driving on the right a little too much. He was constantly giving me instructions and suddenly shouted to tell me to brake, etc. It made me extremely nervous, and that ride was not a very good one. With some hiccups, we came back home in half an hour, and I decided not to let my husband come with me until and unless I became a pro at driving.
The next week, I went out alone, once to the nearby industrial area where we usually go shopping. It's around 6 km away, and there is also a landstraße (highway) where the speed limit is 100 km. I went confidently to the supermarket, Aldi, parked the car in the parking box, went shopping, and came back home safely. The next time I went, I went to my friend Monika's place in Untergrombach, which is around 15 km from my place. I enjoyed the drive and came back very happy.
The interesting thing that I found here is that I had absolutely no fear when driving my own car, but when I was learning to drive, my heart raced every time I sat in the trainer's car. I knew that the trainer had all the controls if something unexpected happened. It was actually safe in there. But I was not driving without fear, or I was never at ease in that car. But in my car, I was a free bird. I was responsible for my and others' safety. I had to drive with caution and confidence. And that was such a liberating feeling, I can't express it in words. It was exactly the same feeling as when I learned to cycle in Germany and started cycling around. It gave me mobility and freedom, and it was extremely important to boost my morale and self-confidence.
In the coming weeks, when my husband was away, I picked up my son from school twice. And I can tell you that he was extremely proud of the fact that now even his mom has come to pick him up from school. All these years, he just saw a few of his friends' moms doing it. Now, it was his mom too. He specifically mentioned to me that when his father is not around in the car, I drive extremely well. "What happens to me when he is around?" he asked. I told him that we both get extremely tensed and feel the pressure because he is a pro at driving and I am just a beginner. I will slowly and steadily get there and make Baba feel at ease when he is sitting next to me.
I drove my neighbor Gila twice: once to the city, where she had to give away her old stuff for a flea market, and the next time to her old friend in another town, 15 km away from us. She was very impressed by the way I drove, and she explicitly told me that she had no fear sitting with me and that she would love to do it in the future too. Coming from a German lady who has been driving all her life, this really meant a lot to me.
I also chauffered my good friend, Yasha, who is a role model for me when it comes to driving. She is an excellent driver. She makes it look so easy! We had a dance practice on Sunday, and I picked her up from her place. She was overjoyed to be able to sit back and relax in the car for a change. All this while, it has always been her who took us places, and now it was my turn. She complimented me on my driving and said that I drive well. I could convince my dad, who had resolved not to come back to Germany owing to the accident and the hospitalization, to come to Germany and sit in my car and go places. When we had our car way back in the 80s, an Ambassador with the numberplate MAP 3859, he always took me to school or picnics, and now it was my turn. That cheered him up so much that he said he will definitely come and will work towards getting back on his feet as soon as possible.
Taking different roads, different routes, exploring small towns and villages, and upgrading my driving and reaction skills is now going to be fun. It's exactly the same as how we live our lives, isn't it? We all have different experiences, and we take different decisions that seem best for us at the time. I realized one very important thing in this process of learning to drive on my own. It's not really important what others think about what you can do or not do. It is extremely important what you think you can do. It's your trust in your own skills and abilities that matters most, and everything else is secondary. So this is a shout-out to all my Indian friends who want to learn to drive but have self-doubt and hesitation. Just come out and trust yourself. You are capable of miracles, and learning to drive is easier than giving birth to babies and nurturing them and giving them a great life.
Take that first step towards independence! It will definitely add color to your personality!
