50 and still counting

Writing has now become a habit and a passion.

When I look back at those 49 posts, which have been written by me, I feel so good and proud of myself. I express my thoughts, concerns, anger at different things, situations and people around me. People have supported me by reading and reacting on whatever I have written and I feel absolutely great about it.

I sometimes feel empty and suddenly, at the next moment, am brimming with thoughts and waiting to put them on paper. Writing helps me unwind and am content with my own world which is formed by my close friends, family (my hubby, in-laws n parents) and this blog. The feeling of being incomplete for not having a child yet does not touch me anymore and I keep those feelings miles away from me by writing more often and talking to my friends and family members, who form the backbone of my existence.

I recently shifted to a new house and am all excited to meet new people and situations which will again prompt me to write about them. Oh, the next post is already cooking in my head. hahaha 

So people, thank you all for your kind support and encouragement and wise words. You have given me immense strength and satisfaction and I promise that I would not let you down.

My baba - The rock in my life

The first hero in any small girl's life is her dad.

He is the superman who can get anything for her.

He is the clown who can make her giggle.

He is the magician who can make all things on the earth seem possible to her.

Being an only child to my parents, my parents doted on me a lot and I grew under very protective environment, which is very natural in a small family. My dad was the strongest person on this earth for me and he could move anything and everything on this earth for me.

Right from selecting my school bag till approving my life partner for me, he has always been there as a massive rock, a massive support in my life. He came to school to fight with my teachers because they made us sit on cold floors. He came and talked to my principal about the things which were bothering many other students like me. From that time, the principal knew me very well and prayed that my father never came to school to meet her. He bought books for me and put nice and new covers for them, which smelled like heaven.

He suffered major setbacks in business, he lost all his money, he literally lost everything. He rose again, without any bitterness towards anyone. The circumstances never changed his love and care towards me and he always protected me fiercely when it came to anything related to me. He helped me a lot when I got the scholarship to go to Germany. He did the minute detailling  for the trip and also helped to do the translation course in German by arranging a student's loan. He is an excellent packer and arranger. He is excellent, when it comes to driving. He can drive any and every vehicle. He is very helpful and all people in my home town know him for his generosity and helpful nature. When we had a medical store, people came at 2 am to take medicines and he happily obliged.

When I got a good job offer from Bangalore, first he was reluctant to send me so far, but when he realized that this was going to be a chance of a life-time, he started with all the arrangements with renewed vigor and came with me to Bangalore and helped me settle there. He was there when I shifted to all the houses in Bangalore. His age was increasing, but the stamina and the interest to do everything possible under the sun for his daughter hadn't diminished a bit. 2 years ago, he had to undergo a major operation and I saw him cry in pain during that phase which I will never be able to forget. I could do nothing, but just watch him suffer. He eventually got better, but has slowed down now. His health is a major concern for me and I keep on asking him to take good care of himself from time to time.

Atul sometimes says that I have become dependent on my dad for every small thing and I can't carry out any task on my own due to his spoon feeding. But then how do I explain him the bond between a father and a daughter? He neither has had a sister in his own family to know about it and he doesn't have a daughter yet. I so very wish that we have a daughter and then he would never say the above words to me ever after. My dad is eagerly waiting for his grandchildren and has all the plans to spoil them big time.

The rock in my life has grown old and withered with time and tide, but has not moved a inch from the place where it is firmly set, i.e in my heart and my life.

Baba,  I will continue to require your emotional and physical support even if I grow 50 years old. You are the best dad in this world and I can't thank you for whatever you have done to make my life better.

Happy Father's day!!

I love you

Driving - a milestone achieved!

My dad had been after me since I was in college to learn 4 wheeler driving. Atul would have loved it if I had learnt driving earlier.  I know I waited for almost 5 years to begin with this, but then there is no age limit for learning any new skill, isn't it?

The necessity of being able to drive and the availability of the car gave an impetus to this resolve of mine. I will be soon shifting to my own house, which is far off from everything and to get things, I have to either walk or take help of the auto, none of the options is always feasible. So, I decided to finally start somewhere with the long postponed driving lessons. I can also drive to my office or to my friends and enjoy all that I have been missing all these years

I enrolled for the driving classes on the day I landed in my home town, Dombivli and on the first day, I had butterflies in my stomach. First lesson was only theory. The teacher explained me the basics and parts in the car etc. , which I very well knew as I have watched Atul drive for 5 years now. But then sitting there as a student made a lot of difference and on day 2, I was out in the traffic of Dombivli, driving, under the instruction of the teacher. Oh wow! What a feeling it was! Sitting behind the wheels and driving a 4 wheeler looked so majestic to me, I am sure it must have looked wow to others as well, ha ha. The teacher held the wheel for first 3 days and then from 4th day, I was on my own managing the wheel and the accelerator. He gave me lot of tips and I asked him lot of questions too. In all I gained a lot of confidence and feel comfortable now to drive my own car when I get to Bangalore.

I had done a driving course in Bangalore too, that was 4 years back, but never had this confidence in myself. Why is it so different today? Is it because of the age factor? or because the need to drive and be independent is above everything else? The roads in Dombivli are crowded, full of potholes and still I managed to start the driving experience decently. When I get on to Bangalore roads, without the instructor, but with my dad, besides me, it is going to be another experience alltogether.

I have been troubling my dad with different queries now. I see the cars moving on the roads and think, what exactly is going on in the person's mind on the driver's seat? My vision is completely changed now. My thoughts and mind are occupied by just driving now. I imagine the roads on which I will be mostly driving. I imagine the road to Mysore or to my office and imagine myself sitting cooly and driving confidently. I have promised Teju to take her, Yeshu and her mom to places where we have been wanting to go all these years. I will take my buddies Sudhir and Koustubh to a long drive. Atul would be the happiest person now as he would now be able to sit next to the driver's seat, which was his long time dream. As soon as I arrive in Bangalore on Saturday, I will drive down to my new house on Sunday as I have to get some things fixed there. Dad wants me only to drive till there and I am all set.

Bengaluru here I come...........

Facebook is a stupid idiot

Most of you who are on the Facebook might have listened to this song by David Ippolito, which depicts the hot favorite Facebook forum,  a widely used social networking site. This had become a craze a few months back and I had loved it the first time I listened to it. If you listen to this song too, you can identify with my anguish at this hugely popular social networking site. Please check out this link to know more about the song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDHb4wewAIQ

Off late, I have started detesting this sudden show off of false emotions and concern of strangers whom we do not even know.

How cool does it feel when a wife learns about the day to day activities of her husband from Facebook, who is abroad for work? He just posts something on Facebook which he is thinking about randomly or posts pictures of some place he visited on a week end and then except her all other people who are not his regular friends, who are in touch with him, flock to give their expert opinions and comments on the photos and his ideas.

How does a husband feel when he comes to know from Facebook that his wife is going for lunch with her friends and meeting up with her old buddies at her favorite restaurant or for that matter has got a driving learners license?

Things that were once very personal and intimate and which were meant to be just between a husband and a wife are first been shared with the junta, most of whom are complete strangers to us and our loved ones are the last ones to get informed. I know many people who are in reality very introvert and have no real friends in flesh and blood, but have 500 friends on the friend list. How can a person be so social and active on net when he/she avoids meeting people personally? Perhaps he/she is comfortable that way because other people do not intrude his so-called private space. But is there a private space left with such social networking sites? 

Birthdays, anniversary, celebrations of any kind, in face the tiniest thing happening in one's life is posted in form of messages on FB and then people who are free and have time and inclination to respond (at his/her whim and fancy) respond on such messages. I may sound very blunt, but I do not feel it comfortable nowadays to share every little joy and sorrow on the net, don't I have real friends to share with? We do not have time for our families and friends, but we make it a point to login to FB and check the status of the other person. Do we call our best friend of yesteryear and wish him on his birthday? Do we ask our married friend who is lost in her child and household duties about her well-being? No, we do not have time to do that, but we have time to comment and leave a scrap on some friend's profile, whom we have not even met in our life.

Too much influx of social networking sites has robbed the pleasure of small and tiny things, which gave immense pleasure and which were meant to be very personal. Technology is taking us away from our loved ones and we all seem to be enjoying it, enjoying getting lost in a tangle of web or virtual friends who wouldn't be there when you really need them.

I am saturated to such an extent now, that I am contemplating to delete my FB account and you won't be surprised if you do not find me there one fine day..

Life of a Mumbaikar

As I have mentioned in my earlier post, I come from a central suburb called Dombivli which is 50 kms away from the main city of Mumbai. If one travels by train, one reaches Mumbai in one hour which is damn impressive compared to the distances one travels and crosses in Pune. Every city has it's own charm and I would like to introduce you all (who have never been to Mumbai) to a normal day in the life of a Mumbaikar.

I travelled for almost 8 years for office and job purposes. My life was dependent on trains. Trains took me places in lesser time. I will not say that the travel was very enjoyable and stress free, but then I had friends with whom I shared seats and my life and experiences. I took the 5:52 am train for almost 3 years of my degree college and that too in all seasons. Monsoons were usually dreaded because there was water clogging at many low lying places and then trains came to a halt one day when there were incessant rains. We sat in trains for many hours or then had to think of an alternative to reach Dombivli. It was not easily possible to reach Dombivli by road. Trains regulated our lives and life without trains was unimaginable.

After staying away from this Mayanagari for almost 7 years, whenever I come to meet my parents and visit my home town Dombivli, I no more recognize the trains in which I travelled once. The trains seem inaccessible to me now. I am the last person to get into the train now. I have become slow and lazy and no more try to get into the running train to catch a seat even before the train halts at the station (My mom is pro in that and it amazes me to see her at this age do it so swiftly). People in the train give me nasty looks and immediately recognize that I am an outsider. Mumbaikars just can't afford to be slow. Their lives are ruled by the clock which ticks away their lives itself. Half of their life is spent in the trains traveling or in the colleges or the working places. They have no private space or private life. Weekends are usually spent relaxing and away from trains. There are no nature or beauty spots nearby where they can go for relaxation. There are huge malls and shopping complexes everywhere, but then an average Mumbaikar can't afford to go there every w/e. The prices of flats and houses are exorbitant and people spend their entire lives and income in just owning a flat/house in this huge city.

My mom is happy by the fact that I am not a part of this hustle bustle anymore because she believes that life in Mumbai is becoming harder day by day and it is getting more and more difficult to survive here. People have to fight for the very basics here, leave alone earning the luxury part. People throng here in millions, but the resources to accomodate them are depleting day by day. Are people bothered about the environment? Doesn't look like..

Ladies, girls, working women fight it out everyday in getting in the train and getting out of it. They come home and manage the show, cook, look after the kids, take their lessons, tend them and their families and are never complaining. Is this the spirit which is very Mumbai special? Accept whatever comes it's way and take all the problems in their stride? Individualism is somewhere lost here in making the two ends meet. But still people are leading their lives.. Do they have any choice in leading a more fulfilling life? Don't think so..

Though I spent 24 years of my life in this city, I somehow feel lost in the crowd now and am unable to keep up with the fast pace at which this city is moving.. 

Good or bad?

Comment please!

Mumbaicha paaus

मुंबई मध्ये मी कालच आले.

मुंबई मध्ये अगदीच नाही म्हणता येणार नाही, डोंबिवली ह्या शहरात माझे आई बाबा राहतात, मुंबई हून एक तास ट्रेन ने लागतो, पण डोंबिवली च्या ऐवजी मी मुंबईचीच असा खपवते मी..

डोंबिवली मध्ये पाय ठेवल्या पासून इकडे पावसाने धूम केली आहे. तसा मुंबईचा पाउस मला नवीन नाही. मी वयाची २५ वर्ष इकडेच होते, पण गेली ६ वर्ष बंगलोर ला असल्यामुळे आता तिकडच्या गोष्टींची सवय (वाईट सवय) झाली आहे. छान हवामान, कमी पाउस आणि ८ महिने थंडी अशी सवय झाल्यामुळे मुंबई खूपच वेगळी वाटते.

काल आल्यापासून  मी एकही मिनिट पंख्या खालून हलले नाहीये..

बाहेर किती ही धो धो पाउस पडत असो, त्या सोबत घामाच्या धारा ह्या ओघाने येतातच. तापमान कायमच उष्ण कितीही काहीही झाला तरीही. इकडे सुती कपडे घालणे शक्य आहे. कितींदा ही अंघोळ केली की उबल्यासारखा होतं. जीव कासावीस होतो आणि कधी एकदा पंख्याच्या खाली बसत्ये असा होतं मला. माझे आई, बाबा जेव्हा माझ्याकडे बंगलोर ला येतात तेव्हा त्यांना किती ही थंडी असली की पंखा हा लागतोच. मी तेव्हा त्यांची चेष्टा करायचे की हे त्यांचं उकडण 'मानसिक" आहे, पण इकडे आल्यापासून मला जाणवतंय की पंखा हा मुंबईचा अविभाज्य घटक आहे आणि मुंबईकर आणि पंखे हे कधीच वेगळे होऊ शकत नाहीत.

मुंबई मध्ये पाउस म्हणजे चिखल, किचाट, त्यात भरपूर गर्दीची भर, छत्र्यांची जत्रा, गाड्यांचा गोंधळ, पण पिण्याच्या पाण्याची टंचाई अश्या अनेक प्रश्नांना तोंड देऊन ही मुंबई कित्येक वर्ष अशीच धडाडीने अविरत चालू आहे. लोकांचे लोंढे येत असतात, मुंबई त्या सगळ्या लोकांना सामावून घेते आणि कायम हसत खेळत असते. किती ही घाव मिळाले तरी कधी ही थकत नाही, किती ही हल्ले झाले मुंबई वर तरीही अवसान न गाळता धिटाई ने पुढे चालतच राहते. मुंबईचं हे रूप तिच्यात वसलेल्या लोकांमुळेच आहे नाही का?

I salute the never say die attitude of Mumbai!

ये ही मुंबई मेरी जान...

:-)

How people change with time

I am in Pune for 2 weeks.

I used to like this city as a child. It was nice, cool, silent hub for pensioners. But now, it is difficult to recognize this city. Nevertheless, this city also houses a few close friends of mine, with whom I had shared some good times, but who are now bound with family responsibilities and do not get time to meet and catch up now. This time I made it a point to catch up with 2 such friends over lunch and we had a great time talking and eating.

That is when they both mentioned about another common friend, whose marriage is fixed now. She was looking out since many years and she was quite old also, nearing forties. I was a bit saddened to know that she didn't thought of informing me about her happiness to me, with whom she shares her last name also. We were close and shared many things, personal and professional. We both were language specialists and people mistook us for sisters. But we only shared the surname and formed a bond which was very strong (At least I had thought so!)

But then when I shifted to Bangalore, we somehow lost touch. I heard that her father was ill and needed monetary help. I helped her like many others would have. She conveyed thanks to my husband for it and not to me. I moved on and forgot all about her strange behavior since past few years.

And then these friends mention about her wedding. They both knew and I didn't. It set me thinking. Maybe she had personal problems, tensions of her own, due to which she shut herself from all others or maybe I had hurt her in some way and she didn't want to keep any contact with me. How do so-called close bonds wither away with time? It dawned upon me, these bonds or such bonds were never strong and hence they changed with time and circumstances. I felt a bit sad that she didn't think of me in her good times, but then cheered up saying that we had only that much to share and exchange and talk about.

ऋणानुबंध तेवढेच होते आमचे असा विचार आला पटकन.. 

I wished her all the best (of course not on her face) and moved on. 
 

Pune - hit or heat

I came to Pune almost 2 weeks ago.

This is a personal plus official trip to Pune. My team mates sit here and my in-laws stay here too. So it was a double joy in coming to Pune. But coming to Pune or for that matter any place in Maharashtra requires a lot of mental preparation, which I did 2 weeks before coming here.

Something has struck me so badly since I have arrived here that I almost forgot that I am a regular blogger. My senses have become numb, my mind has become like a blank slate. When I tried to evaluate what this "something" is, I realized that the traffic, pollution and heat have had a profound effect on me and have almost zapped me.

Roads are teeming with vehicles and people and vegetable vendors and cyclists and 4 wheelers and of course, 2 wheelers, how can I forget them? There is literally no place to walk for poor people like me who do not own a 2 wheeler or 4 wheeler here. We (people walking on their feet) are the most neglected category on the roads and anyone (2 wheeler riders) can come from anywhere and give us a nice shock and the next moment we would be sitting/sleeping on the road, wondering.. We were nicely walking, what happened suddenly!! Before we realize, the vehicle has already sped away and we have to get up on our own and go home feeling like a fool. And yes, traffic signals are not meant to be abided. They are just there for the sake of it. It is very common trait of a Punekar on a 2 wheeler or a 4 wheeler to speed away just when the signal is especially red !!

If you try to argue with any Punekar (people who are here since generations) you will feel very amused and it will give you an insight into their real nature. No matter how wrong they are, they will always point out a finger at you. They are proud of things which they haven't done and they are always ready to go to any extent to prove their point which is often wrong. I think there is something in the water of Pune, which makes people so adamant and blunt and haughty.

The heat in Pune is unbearable. I keep wondering, if I am having a bath with water or with sweat. The moment I am away from fan, I am helpless. I miss Bangalore like crazy for it's wonderful weather. The traffic problem is there in almost all metro cities, but Pune has gone from bad to worse. There are just concrete jungles everywhere due to which the temperatures have soared like crazy in the past 5-10 years. But I also little awareness about the pollution problems here. No trees left, no new trees planted, no cleanliness. People use cloth bags for shopping, would that suffice? Dunno..

It is good to come here for some time, be with people whom I love (in-laws, a few friends) and go back to namma Bengaluru. Bengaluru is my home town since past 6 years only, but has grown closer to heart, because this city has a lovely weather for most of the months in the year, this city gave me a decent job, my husband rose to a good position, gave me some wonderful friends and most important, our dream house.

My trip to Mumbai, Dombivli to be precise, will give birth to a few more posts, keep watching for more!!

:-)